About the Andrew Cahak
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Andrew Cahak is a comedian, writer, artist and agent provocateur currently living in Minneapolis, MN. Cahak (pronounced “Sah-hock” but he’ll forgive you for butchering it) has been featured multiple times in the 10,000 Laughs Festival and is the host of the podcast Dogbrain with Andrew Cahak. He also co-created and co-hosts Fresh Hell Comedy Ka-Blingo and the high-concept comedy showcase The Devil, You Say! Dracula is his stand up comedy debut.
In addition to his comedic work, Cahak has self-published a long poem, Cannibals, in a chapbook format and is currently prepping a second book of collected prose poems. He was also involved in various capacities with the Iowa rock band Brian Jones. He also hosts a ridiculous podcast about nu metal music called Life Was Peachy.
Andrew Cahak was born in NE Wisconsin and grew up in suburban Cedar Rapids, Iowa, the best place on Earth.
He wrote this biography in third person because someone had to do it and it wasn’t going to be you, now was it?
Liner Notes
I wanted to call this record Led Zeppelin II 2. I still kind of wish I had. The only thing is, that title doesn’t mean anything. Dracula, though? Dracula means something. It’s weird to say that a comedy album is about something, because most of us aren't used to thinking about comedy albums that way. But this album is about something. It’s about monsters and pain and darkness and love and time and fear.
In college, I worked at a 24 hour convenience store. One day, a man dressed in a ragged, grungy windbreaker and dusty stonewashed jeans came in to buy a cup of coffee. As I rang him up, he told me that I had The Fear.
"I can see it in your eyes,” he said. “You have The Fear.”
Then, without another word, he revealed his true form as a cursed prince and disappeared in a cloud of smoke, as if a centuries-long spell had been broken. I'm haunted by that moment often, usually in my darkest times, and its mystery gnaws at me. I assume that’s how he freed himself of his curse: by spreading it to me.
I recorded this album on the 7th anniversary of the first time I tried stand up. My first set (if you could call it that) was at the open mic at Grumpy’s in downtown Minneapolis, an indomitable place if ever there was one (until it was demolished because Minneapolis needs more condos!). In fact, the incident described in ‘An Orgy of Despair’ (track 2) happened at Grumpy’s, just a few weeks before the album recording. Doing comedy there every Wednesday helped me in ways I can’t quite articulate. I didn’t feel comfortable calling myself a comedian until I could win-over that crowd at Grumpy’s, as indifferent and obstinate as they were. I met people I love there, I had some of the worst nights of my life there. And on that tiny, dumb stage, I overcame my fear. It’s hard not to when you’ve got a sea of unimpressed, unblinking faces staring at you while you pour out the most intimate parts of yourself. At least, if you’re doing it right, anyway. Now, I’m not afraid of anything except sharks and loving the wrong kind of woman (see track 3).
This material may be uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable with some of it, you can hear it in my voice. It covers a wide gamut of things I reckon with every day. It’s important to acknowledge the parts of yourself that scare you. We live our lives in conflict: with what we want from others, with what we want from ourselves, with what we are. Stand up is one of my most beloved things and it has also brought me some of my deepest heartbreaks. It’s eternal love, it’s sharp teeth in the darkness. It’s the power to ensorcel an audience. It’s the thing you want to give yourself over to but you know it will take everything you have if you let it. It’s The Fear. That’s what Dracula is about.
By the way, if you’re reading this, you have The Fear, too. Or, to quote a long lost friend: now you got what I got. Whew, now *I’m* free of the curse. Damn, I should have done that years ago.
Anyway, Led Zeppelin II 2. I’ll probably use it for my next album so don’t steal it! I mean it!
-Andrew Cahak, Minneapolis, MN December 2018
Recorded at Minnehaha Recording Company, Minneapolis, MN on April 28th, 2018
Mike Linden mastered the ceremony
Adam Quesnell warmed up the audience
Music by Zac Naughton
Engineered and mastered by Tony Williamette
Edited & Mixed by Adam Kokontis
Cover photo by Leland Meiners
Design by Andrew Cahak for ILLWILL
Legal counsel: Mitch Billings, Esq
Produced by Andrew Cahak & Adam Kokontis c/o Industrico Inc. for Math La
This is Math Lab 005.
Thanks
Thanks to you (probably [but not definitely]), Mike Linden, Steven Montenegro, Adam Kokontis, Zac Naughton, Luke Meyer, Mike Schulte (and Molly [& Charles]), Brian Jones, Katrina Benning, Kevin Koppes, Grant Jackson & Rosie Math, The Iowa Hawkeyes, pretty much all of Cedar Rapids and Iowa City and a good chunk of Minneapolis, Matt Kohr, Courtney Baka, Patrick Ryan Bauer, Chris Maddock, Adam Quesnell, Cornelius Allegrezza, Chad Martin, Jeff Pfoser, Zach Coulter, Chris Knutson, Courtney McClean, Anna Weggel, Sam (Veldie) Papke, The Tall Boys, Micah Walsh, Nick Piontek, Mike O’Keefe, Amber Preston, Rana May, Eliot Rahal, Robert Baril, Henry Fuguitt, Trish Cook, James Wells, Benny Quash, John Conroy, Matt Fugate, Andy Brynildson and the MNCS crew, Cullen Ryan and Jordan Duroe (and everyone at Clear Water Comedy), Stevie Hottman, Laura Westley-Williams, Katie Sisneros, Tim Anderson, Dan Linden, Swiss, Peter Vader, Jonathan Meachum, Brenda Peters, Ian Fishman, Lauren Schwein, Logan Baker, Leland Meiners, Christina Bornstein, Ed Bornstein, Bob & Kim Gudenkauf, Scott & Chasity Brimeyer, Dan & Joy Meter, Mason & Krystle Moline, Curt Readel, Bradley Adita, Bryan Ische, Tom Loftus, Noah Paster, Steve Yasgar, Martin Devaney, Ian Rans, Becky Rothmeier, Meghan Crawley, everyone who contributed on IndieGoGo, Leo Kokontis, Squishi, Claudia Holt, The Cahaks, The Ostermans (and all of Minerva’s Mafia), Abi (& John) and Patty.
Dedicated to Minerva Osterman. Sorry for being so crass, Grandma.
In memory of Matt Davis, Kate Urquhart, Bill Young, and Gus Lynch.
Acknowledgments
Buy Dracula
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